DO
Everyone has goals. Have you ever asked yourself what yours are? It is very common for us to dream rather than plan. We tend to feel rather than think. These are not only common but necessary ways of coping. Pressure from a myriad of issues can and will consume our psyche if not balanced. WE have all felt out of balance emotionally. This is also very normal. It is interesting to follow how success and failure are looked at by folks. How is that defined? These are not simply observations but the very core issues that prevent us from becoming "successful."
It is the same for all of us from the kid planning his future to the CEO planning his company's expansion. We are human and we have the same natural whirlpools waiting to put the whammy on our goals. It will be very enlightening to journey along the road that has been cleared of booby traps (at least the ones we set for ourselves), allowing a clear path to our objective. Let's talk about goals!
No matter how young or old the person, education level, IQ, job held, married, single or whatever, we must first DO (Define Objective) if we are to clear a path to the goal. Our goals get sidetracked in a way we will explore in detail but in general our mind mixes emotion with rationality to insure that neither is quite defined in our brain. The resulting confusion not only sabotages any chance of progress toward our objective while we try to dig out from the mess we create in our head, but keeps us in a fog obscuring where we want to end up. If a conductor wants his train to leave the station in Denver with the goal of arriving in Salt Lake at a certain time he must stay on the correct track and keep the locomotive traveling at the correct speed. If he becomes confused, angry or sad he could switch to another track, stop, wreck or simply go to Atlanta. It is somewhat comical to imagine this scenario except when we stop and think about the freight, passengers and the conductor's job will certainly be impacted. We can't even imagine this type of behavior yet we all do this inside our heads every day. We lose sight of our goal, our objective. This is when we tend to work super hard and find ourselves further behind than when we started. Even more concerning is when we start off without a clear defined objective. This is doom for anything productive.
There is a way to control this. It will work for anyone who has a real desire to gain control over the most powerful force humankind has been given, rational thought!
STAY TUNED
DO...DEFINE OBJECTIVE
Friday, October 6, 2017
Tuesday, October 3, 2017
What would you do...?
Looking at issues involving us humans is puzzling to say the least. We seem to arrive at conflict before we define the exact issue. Looking in the humanity mirror at this particular time we see reflections of conflict seemingly everywhere. I find the current issue with the "flag" to be a prime example of this. Please bear with me and allow me to explain.
Be aware that there will be no taking of sides, only questions and some conclusions that seem obvious if taken on their rationality rather than the emotion they seek to purvey. The premise is as simple as how we were taught in school about how to prepare to debate any subject. We were routinely given topics to defend or attack that the instructor knew we disagreed with. The idea was to learn the formula for developing and delivering a view or idea. The debate would be about a defined subject...war, God, hunger, abortion or anything really...as long as it was defined! The byproduct whether intended or not resulted in the debaters developing empathy on some level for the other view. Remember that to have empathy does not require agreement or sympathy for the folks that you disagree with, only your honest attempt to look at what drives their opinions. In order to resolve any issue for the long term we need to define what it is we are actually debating first. If we don't agree on a subject how can we even begin to discuss it.
This "flag" issue we are facing today is representative of this. First there is no defined issue and secondly there is no empathy. OK, I hear you...peoples lives do matter and...almost everyone is emotional right now after reading that. This emotional reaction and the image it evokes in our minds are the very reason we circle the wagons and stay stuck in the mud. Right now imagine one other issue that you care about. Think about how passionate you are about that issue and your view on it. You may feel some emotion but until an opposing view is presented you will use mainly rational thought. Our brains are very predictable. We settle down and use rational thought when our opinion is not threatened. We get steadily less rational and more emotional as opposing views are presented. Not to big of a surprise to anyone, yet it keeps us from making any progress.
If we feel strongly about something it seems prudent that we proceed in a manner that has the best chance of resolution in our favor. On this issue it seems that there are two sides, no middle and no rational discussion. On one side we have folks who see social injustice and want it resolved. The other side wants respect. So if we had any empathy at all we would see that they both feel like they have no power except public demonstrations. We can flip those descriptions of the two sides and see that emotionally they feel the same way. They real question is "What do we do?"
It is obvious that no government agency can fix this. Each "flag" group use the last 2 Presidents as poster boys for what is either right or wrong with the country. The truth is, WE are what's right and wrong with this country. Above is described the formula for every conflict in the history of mankind. It is why history repeats and why society can be assured of morphing into a system based on the power of the leaders and who owns them. In all of these instances there is a group that supports change and one that longs for how things used to be or should be. It is in our nature.
There are opportunistic people everywhere. Some of them are smart. They know what is described here and more. Salesmen are taught that human nature dictates having your potential customer laughing and having fun is far more likely to result in a sale than educating them to the actual features and value of the product. This is because we buy things that we want far more often than the more logical choices. Emotion wins again. We aren't Vulcan and there is certainly room for emotion in just about all aspects of human existence, but not in problem solving! Sure any debate will get testy or maybe heated, but rules in place to bring us back on point and a concise subject established to actually fix things is mandatory if meaningful results can be expected.
The NFL has many players, owners and other employees are in the forefront due to the popularity of the sport. People feel one way or the other about the way they have handled it. The owners and management may have personal feelings but will always act in the interest of profits, we understand that. As the players go I can't help but wonder what is going on in those young men's minds. If your son or daughter was 21 and got hired by an entertainment company, moved to a strange town, given a million dollars and put on television would they suddenly morph into an on air personality? Does he want to do this? Is he scared? Does he not want to do this and feels pressured? Has he wanted to do it for a long time remembering images from his childhood and feels empowered that he is no longer alone? How about the veteran cop who is assigned to the usual awesome duty of NFL games? He may be friends with coaches or players but sees this as an offense to his service. Maybe he remembers horrific images from his past. Is he game day buddies with the kid on the sidelines that doesn't know what to do and reacts by kneeling? What happens to that friendship? Empathy is wondering and imagining these types of things. We have so many groups feeling so many emotions but I have yet to read or hear any bridge building. Appeasing one or the other side to quell emotion temporarily will not work. Someone with a LOUD voice need to put this in perspective and call for actual discussion. Yelling people down, fights, boycotts are not solutions. Every person needs to develop empathy and we can do this ourselves! It is the only way. Get smarter, help each other, care!
There will be noise! The controlling noise will attempt to get in between us. Think of two giant organizations we all know. First lets look at the NFL. Giant business hires a Commissioner to basically be hated and locked in the stakes in the center of town to be cursed and have rotten vegetables thrown at him. People personally hate Roger Goodell because he did this to this player and not that one or team owner. Emotion rules and the reality is never seen while almost every decision the NFL makes is directly tied to gambling or court stuff(I'll debate that as a fact if needed)!
How about something really important, like life? Our AMA governs the medical industry and insures it's sustained profitability. It is fairly common knowledge that curing someone is not the most profitable result. Therefore the people who want to actually be healthy or happen to get sick must do research on their own if they want to get to the truth! The same applies to everything. We tend to headline watch becoming a cheerleader or a militant before digesting any real information. The headline is more than enough to send us away from rationality. By the way, it seems many folks have great ideas as to what they want and don't want, but tangible applications are nowhere to be found.
Hope rests in empathy. Empathy is the goal. A great way to start is to ask first ourselves if we were given the voice to make changes...What Would You Do? Then go ask someone with the opposite view what they would do? That's the start we all need.
Be aware that there will be no taking of sides, only questions and some conclusions that seem obvious if taken on their rationality rather than the emotion they seek to purvey. The premise is as simple as how we were taught in school about how to prepare to debate any subject. We were routinely given topics to defend or attack that the instructor knew we disagreed with. The idea was to learn the formula for developing and delivering a view or idea. The debate would be about a defined subject...war, God, hunger, abortion or anything really...as long as it was defined! The byproduct whether intended or not resulted in the debaters developing empathy on some level for the other view. Remember that to have empathy does not require agreement or sympathy for the folks that you disagree with, only your honest attempt to look at what drives their opinions. In order to resolve any issue for the long term we need to define what it is we are actually debating first. If we don't agree on a subject how can we even begin to discuss it.
This "flag" issue we are facing today is representative of this. First there is no defined issue and secondly there is no empathy. OK, I hear you...peoples lives do matter and...almost everyone is emotional right now after reading that. This emotional reaction and the image it evokes in our minds are the very reason we circle the wagons and stay stuck in the mud. Right now imagine one other issue that you care about. Think about how passionate you are about that issue and your view on it. You may feel some emotion but until an opposing view is presented you will use mainly rational thought. Our brains are very predictable. We settle down and use rational thought when our opinion is not threatened. We get steadily less rational and more emotional as opposing views are presented. Not to big of a surprise to anyone, yet it keeps us from making any progress.
If we feel strongly about something it seems prudent that we proceed in a manner that has the best chance of resolution in our favor. On this issue it seems that there are two sides, no middle and no rational discussion. On one side we have folks who see social injustice and want it resolved. The other side wants respect. So if we had any empathy at all we would see that they both feel like they have no power except public demonstrations. We can flip those descriptions of the two sides and see that emotionally they feel the same way. They real question is "What do we do?"
It is obvious that no government agency can fix this. Each "flag" group use the last 2 Presidents as poster boys for what is either right or wrong with the country. The truth is, WE are what's right and wrong with this country. Above is described the formula for every conflict in the history of mankind. It is why history repeats and why society can be assured of morphing into a system based on the power of the leaders and who owns them. In all of these instances there is a group that supports change and one that longs for how things used to be or should be. It is in our nature.
There are opportunistic people everywhere. Some of them are smart. They know what is described here and more. Salesmen are taught that human nature dictates having your potential customer laughing and having fun is far more likely to result in a sale than educating them to the actual features and value of the product. This is because we buy things that we want far more often than the more logical choices. Emotion wins again. We aren't Vulcan and there is certainly room for emotion in just about all aspects of human existence, but not in problem solving! Sure any debate will get testy or maybe heated, but rules in place to bring us back on point and a concise subject established to actually fix things is mandatory if meaningful results can be expected.
The NFL has many players, owners and other employees are in the forefront due to the popularity of the sport. People feel one way or the other about the way they have handled it. The owners and management may have personal feelings but will always act in the interest of profits, we understand that. As the players go I can't help but wonder what is going on in those young men's minds. If your son or daughter was 21 and got hired by an entertainment company, moved to a strange town, given a million dollars and put on television would they suddenly morph into an on air personality? Does he want to do this? Is he scared? Does he not want to do this and feels pressured? Has he wanted to do it for a long time remembering images from his childhood and feels empowered that he is no longer alone? How about the veteran cop who is assigned to the usual awesome duty of NFL games? He may be friends with coaches or players but sees this as an offense to his service. Maybe he remembers horrific images from his past. Is he game day buddies with the kid on the sidelines that doesn't know what to do and reacts by kneeling? What happens to that friendship? Empathy is wondering and imagining these types of things. We have so many groups feeling so many emotions but I have yet to read or hear any bridge building. Appeasing one or the other side to quell emotion temporarily will not work. Someone with a LOUD voice need to put this in perspective and call for actual discussion. Yelling people down, fights, boycotts are not solutions. Every person needs to develop empathy and we can do this ourselves! It is the only way. Get smarter, help each other, care!
There will be noise! The controlling noise will attempt to get in between us. Think of two giant organizations we all know. First lets look at the NFL. Giant business hires a Commissioner to basically be hated and locked in the stakes in the center of town to be cursed and have rotten vegetables thrown at him. People personally hate Roger Goodell because he did this to this player and not that one or team owner. Emotion rules and the reality is never seen while almost every decision the NFL makes is directly tied to gambling or court stuff(I'll debate that as a fact if needed)!
How about something really important, like life? Our AMA governs the medical industry and insures it's sustained profitability. It is fairly common knowledge that curing someone is not the most profitable result. Therefore the people who want to actually be healthy or happen to get sick must do research on their own if they want to get to the truth! The same applies to everything. We tend to headline watch becoming a cheerleader or a militant before digesting any real information. The headline is more than enough to send us away from rationality. By the way, it seems many folks have great ideas as to what they want and don't want, but tangible applications are nowhere to be found.
Hope rests in empathy. Empathy is the goal. A great way to start is to ask first ourselves if we were given the voice to make changes...What Would You Do? Then go ask someone with the opposite view what they would do? That's the start we all need.
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